Over the past year the TinyTown Police Department has come across numerous articles that have been dropped off at the Police Station or found around town appearing to be abandoned property.
Please scroll through the pictures at the bottom of this page. If you recognize any of these artifacts please click on the “comments” link and leave all pertinent information. A representative from the station boutique and evidence locker will be in touch shortly. Buckle up, drive safely, and have a nice day.
Grail/goblet: found behind St. Arnold's Church
Hockey Goalie's Mask: found in the woods with abandoned chainsaw (previously claimed by owner).
Xylophone: found rolling down Cliff Street at extremely high speed, pursued by officers for nearly 4 miles before being apprehended.
Bucket of Lard (approximate weight: 15 lbs.): Suspiciously left in the doorway the Vegan Hut, Natural Food Emporium & Craft Center
Dentures (apparently belonging to a toothless, adult male): Thrown through an open window of Tiny Mind Gazette in mid-July 2009.
Religious Artifact (one of several such items contained in the evidence locker)
Mysterious Object (perhaps paper weight or squeezable stress-relief vehicle)
Cordless Toaster (with 2 pieces, burnt toast): left in backseat of patrol car
Large Jar of Pickled Onions: Gift to the TT Police Chief, 1972
Academy Award or Nobel Peace Prize, perhaps (engraving is unreadable)
Soup Thermos: Two-thirds of the way through high-speed chase, flew off of xylophone, crashed through the windshield of the patrol car and landed in the back seat – next to the cordless toaster.
I believe the xylophone was used by Diane Kennedy at the last Musty Slippers parade. I'd ask her. But I would not infer anything about the lard.
If the Thermos contains Sanka, beef bouillon or clam chowder, it's definitely Scrim's.
Posted by: Jane Peyton | 01/22/2010 at 07:57 AM