When you you visit the Stop&Chat® grocery store’s, “You be the Employee,” automated checkout system or any of the Sobering Bank®, ATMs – you are given language choice of either English or Español. This should be proof enough that our town is undergoing a cultural revolution/invasion.
To honor our new Spanish-speaking brethren and bretherinas, the Center for International Studies will be sponsoring the town’s first “Running of the Turkeys” on Saturday, November 21 at noon, in front of the abandoned (and most likely haunted) former Hardware Store. Obviously, a holiday twist on Pamplona Spain’s “Running of the Bulls,” the event will be open to all citizens (including those holding current Green Cards and Temporary Visas), ages 4 and up.
The town’s health department would like to remind everyone that although everything will be done to authenticate the event – live turkeys will not be used. Instead, frozen turkeys will be “shot” out of the beds of highway department vehicles, at various locations through out the village. For those with vegan tendencies, frozen TOFUrkey’s will be used in the areas surrounding the health food store.
As a final reminder, when traveling at speeds up to 30 mph, any form of frozen fowl can quickly become a dangerous object. The Department of Safety is urging all participants, including spectators, to wear proper protective headgear.
We look forward to seeing everyone on Saturday!
